Book Review – What Fresh Hell is This? by J.A.C Beardmore

“She was literally staring Death in the face and Death looked more than a bit pissed off that she wasn’t a pizza.”

What Fresh Hell is This? by J.A.C. Beardmore

Why This Rating?

Full Discloser: I received an advanced reader copy of this book in exchange for a voluntary honest review.

For starters, the title and cover caught my attention too! It really wasn’t sure how well it was going to go, but this book was even better than I could have thought! Honestly not sure if the title is the best fit for it now that I have it finished, but it was catchy so it works. Also, the cover makes SO much more sense after finished it. I would say this is a book for anyone who like Horror movies or books and for those of us who really liked the Men in Black movie series. Which I will say I am a proud fan of! Now, I know that is a really odd combination, but trust me it makes sense. If you’ve seen the movie, you know that the MIB is a secret organization that works with aliens from other planets live and visit Earth. THUMB (Tactical Homeland Unique Missions Bureau) does that whole thing too but for the creatures and people that we’ve seen in the scary movies and books. Conceptually, everything we’ve ever seen in a horror movie or read in a horror book is actually based on real people and creatures in the world. Most of these individuals are just trying to live life and reform their lives into something good. And THUMB is the organization that these individuals have to report to or get to complain to/ask for help from. Their Agents deal with these clients and situations. How freaking cool is that writing concept?!? I’m not even the biggest fan of Horror movies and I enjoyed this so stinking much!

I loved the subtle nods Beardmore writes for some of Agent Mitchell’s clients. Now, the author does keep most of these characters a tad to the right of what their true identities are. Which in my opinion works better for him than saying out right “Here’s Johnny”. It even made for a little game to me. I was trying to see if I recognized any of the clients. There were some that probably went straight over my head, but a few of the clients I am pretty confident I’ve figured out. I’m pretty sure there was Chucky, the Sanderson Sisters (the 3 witches from Hocus Pocus), and I’m guessing one of the clients to be Dracula. – Let me know if you recognize any more clients or movie/book scenes!

Now for the rest of the writing, the dialogues were smooth. I liked the relaxed conversations we encountered. It never felt uptight or ridged at any point. However, Commander Dixie does do one thing that bothered me while I was reading. She wasn’t using “Ya’ll” correctly most of the time. This is my Southern upbringing coming out, but using Ya’ll, you need at least two people for it to work the best. Most of the time Dixie would use it while talking with only Agent Mitchell or directing Mitchell to do something by herself. It’s a little thing that really doesn’t make the biggest difference. It is probably overlooked by most readers. Just happens to be something I am surrounded by and live with daily so it stood out. Descriptions were on point! Heads up, there might be just a few exploded bodies and bloody scenes scattered throughout the book. (Think old school horror movies and the gross out scenes that would pop up here and there.) I never thought that any of these scenes were too much to handle.

There are a few extra stories happening side-by-side with the main story. We’re introduced and follow a genetically enhanced rat named Jasper as he makes his way around the labs at the Outpost. And then happening above the secret base, there is a farmer named John, who is having a hell of a time with his cows and the crazy things that are happening around the farm. From playing baseball and making things explode to cake and chocolate being created from thin air, John is going a tad crazier every day. These 2 stories have virtually nothing to do with the plot. I didn’t mind that they were included. It sort of broke up time during certain intervals in the base for the reader which was quite brilliant. But they really aren’t necessary for anything other than a single moment at the very end of the book. Cute stories, but ehh. I feel for John though. All I can say to him is, every moo is all in the interpretation of the receiver.

Here are a few things that I wanted to share and it probably won’t make any sense unless you go read the book, but they’ve been sitting with me for a bit since finishing it and I need to vent my thoughts. Frankie should have been able to pop in sooner. I get manners keeps him from doing so, OK I hear you, but whatever! I want a Grady for my own home. The fact he can and will materialize whatever your heart desires (and it is usually food) is just an amazing thing! Mine = Mall Pretzels from Auntie Anne’s. There should be someone who regularly goes around and checks on the help buttons in the offices. I think this might have made me a tad paranoid with these “help buttons” under desks and such. I don’t work in a job that needs this, but if I did I feel I’d be looking at these a bit harder than I did before reading this book. I wanted Death to visit more!

I am looking forward to what else might come from the THUMB verse in the future!

Time to get lost in the next story!